The cast

I routinely refer to and speak (highly) about friends and family here, because to devote this site entirely to stories about myself does not an audience build. For Respect Reasons, I don’t use real names, but the folks to whom I’m referring (probably) recognize themselves through the (unfortunately terrible) pseudonyms I generate on-the-spot.

I wish I was better at nicknames. Scratch that: I’m sure my loved ones wish I was better at nicknames.

BFFF. My best fucking friend forever. If you don’t get it, watch Pineapple Express. Anyway, she lives in another state, which might as well be on another planet. When we lived in the same state we spent approximately all day together, either in person or through technology. She has three kiddos and a husband. I really need to work on buying the house next door to them.

Brudder. My younger (only) brother, who despite being over 25 years old, will forever be about 19 to me. 

Bruiser. My father. I have no idea where this nickname came from. No one actually calls him this. It lasted approximately one whole day before everyone in the family forgot about it. But not me!

Gentleman Friend. This is my boyfriend of 2.5-ish years.

Juanita. My mother. This is another forgotten nickname that very few people were ever in on. I’m good at latching onto that sort of junk.

T. My in-state BFF. No one gets me like she does. And vice versa. I’ve never felt more comfortable around another human being.

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