From the variety bin

Apple Mango Tango.
To say that the intoxicating odor of this laundry detergent is like crack to me just cheapens the thrill I receive with each inhalation – to use such a tired cliche does not do any justice for my passion for this scent. Also, the metaphor is not accurate, as Gain doesn’t easily mix with the drain cleaner, which makes forming a decent rock more difficult and harder to smoke. Sniff sniff, hooray indeed.

The iPad.
The name is slightly unfortunate (a Google Images search already includes parodies involving feminine hygiene products), but man alive! It is purty! Forget about the technology gurus and programmers that Apple employs: their design team is PRIMO. Those folks could package and sell actual maxi pads and the public would be flocking to Rite-Aids nationwide. Riots in the aisles of Walgreens… On the parking lot of CVS…

The snowpocalypse

First, y’all DO know that I just blatantly rip this images off from Google, right? The pic at left is titled “Bryant Park Blizzard ’06.” I have no idea where or who Bryant Park is, and I’m far too lazy to figure it out, so we’ll leave it at that.

Anyway, apparently some big “front” is headed “our way” and will bring “shit tons of snow.” I actually live on the far northern edge of said “front,” so I’ll probably see nothing. But according to friends further south, the air is thick  with anticipation. And other chemical pollutants.

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