Wading in mental quicksand

I thought myself into a hole tonight. Has that ever happened to you? Man, it’s the worst. One little thing leads your brain to another little thing and on and on until it’s the end of the goddamn world.

The worst part of it all? You know it’s all bullshit. You know that, under different circumstances – the moon, the tide, your brain chemistry, what you fucking ate for breakfast – if any of that were different, you’d be fine. Water off a duck’s back. But instead all these little thoughts are snagged like burrs on your brain and you can’t shake them. Actually, shaking makes it worse.

And then maybe someone tries to engage you, but too bad for them because your brain is just not having it. And you try to fight your way through this mental quicksand but man, it’s exhausting.

I have absolutely no indication that I won’t have my shit straight by tomorrow, but for now: ugh. Just ugh.

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