things learned in retrospect

I learned many things this week, and it’s only Tuesday.
  1. Don’t spray Pam on something while you’re standing in the middle of your kitchen, because what don’t hit the pan, hits the floor.  Picture a cartoon character on a banana peel.
  2. When Netflix says something is “Available Until 5/4/10” that doesn’t mean that 5/4/10 is the final day one can View Instantly. It means 5/4/10 is the day you log in to Netflix to see that particular something has been removed from your Instant Queue.
  3. Sometimes people mean it when they flirt with you.
  4. My laptop does not have a touch screen.
  5. Some thoughts are better left unsaid. Some are even better left unthought.
  6. When assembling a Priority Mail box, under no circumstances are you to remove the adhesive strip until the ends of the box have been folded inward. I mean, the box can be assembled that way, but not without cussing loudly in the Post Office, which seems to dismay the employees and affect the quality of your service.

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