the sloppy copy

Are a capella versions of songs technically “covers”? I don’t think so, but I found this one by accident and it’s way too good not to share.

First, the original (skip the vid):

“God Only Knows” / The Beach Boys (1966)

The Allmusic reviewer uses the phrase “transcendently lovely” to describe this song. Oooh, I like that one. Might have to shamelessly appropriate that for my own use sometime.  Also, this might just be my favorite Beach Boys tune, and definitely my favorite from Pet Sounds.

But what have we here?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H76Qan5MptI

“God Only Knows” / Petra Haden

Well, isn’t that divine (transcendently lovely, even)? And here’s the best part: she’s doing all of it. All of it. To perfection. I don’t know much about a capella music, but this piece is all layered and dimensional – I don’t know how to appropriately describe it, just that it sounds sooooo good – and I want to hear more!

According to this Esquire.com article, “Crazy” is “one of the most over-covered songs of 2006.”
I guess I’ve been living under a rock because I’ve not heard any of them until today.

First: the original:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bd2B6SjMh_w

“Crazy” / Gnarls Barkley (2006)
Like every-freaking-one else, I liked this one a lot when it was first released (well, to be clear, I still do). And, like (probably?) most people, it’s Cee-Lo’s vocals that do it for me, with Danger Mouse’s beats coming in second.* But I’ve got no critical feedback here. I just like the song. Couldn’t tell you anything else on which they collaborated. Just this, played on the radio fifty times a day for two years.

And apparently it’s been covered just as much? Here’s one that I found intriguing before I even heard it:

“Crazy” / Ray LaMontagne (2006)

This one’s alright; I could take it or leave it. I do like the fact that I can actually sing along with it (Cee-Lo! How you sing so hiiiiigh?), and I do enjoy me some Mr. LaMontagne and his Magic Musical Beard…but something about the tempo at the beginning got me. Too many words, or something. Just not the same feel. But! Still fun to listen to and compare with the original, no?

*Mmmm, like how I casually tossed out that phrase? Like I’m all “chyeah, I know what I’m doing. And I say things like ‘chyeah'”? Chyeah.

Trent Reznor is…well, we can all agree he is an extremely talented man, yes? Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way…

“Hurt” / Nine Inch Nails (1994)

In spite of the rising of the chorus, the dip of those minor keys and the solid, static melancholy of the lyrics, this song takes me in a horizontal direction. I am neither uplifted or downtrodden after listening. It’s something that needs to just sit and be digested over time, I guess.

That is to say, it’s good. It’s thick and chewy and satisfying.

So who better to take this song and slice through it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o22eIJDtKho

“Hurt” / Johnny Cash (2002)

I often wonder if a song is made “good” (to me, in my own personal-est of opinions) by the performer, the writer or a combination of both. And is it fair to load an entire artist’s previous body of work onto each subsequent song he performs? Is everything he does the culmination of everything he’s done?

I can’t help but do this, particularly with the artists with whom I’m most familiar. The user who uploaded the video of Cash’s version writes “This poignant performance of Nine Inch Nail’s, ‘Hurt’ is almost haunting, as it was recorded just prior to Cash’s untimely death.” I agree, but it still resonated with me when it was first released. “Whether or not a Johnny Cash fan, this performance is powerful and deep with emotion,” the user adds. I’m not sure I can phrase it better, though I might add that the video, too, is haunting – almost uncomfortable to watch.

So which one’s better? I can’t play that game. They’re both incredibly powerful and effective at digging up your emotions – maybe even more powerful than Reznor originally intended, though that one’s another debate for another time.

Despite having kinda-sorta grown up during his heydey, I was – for the most part – unaware of Michael Jackson’s existence aside from knowing he was the kid in the Jackson 5 and the dude who’s hair caught fire (I have a very clear memory of being near the snack-food aisle at a local grocery store once when one of his songs started playing and my mom stopped to tell me the story of how it happened). Uh, anyway.

I had a friend in grade school, let’s call her Val, with whom I would listen to Michael Jackson’s Bad on her (in retrospect) comically-large boombox and dance around her parents’ living room. Not the Moonwalk, per se, just wild flailing of arms and so forth. I remember attempting a handstand in that living room once, to the detriment of a low-hanging chandelier. You get the picture.

Val really liked this song. We’d often listen to it, press the Rewind button (aw, kids! Remember rewind buttons? Of course not) and listen to it again, dancing and listening and flailing all the while.

“Smooth Criminal” / Michael Jackson (1987)

Fast-forward (kids, they had fast-forward buttons, too!) to my first summer home from college. I was making some mad money at a local fast-food place, where the radio in the back was always cranked to the local Top 40 station (this, kids, is also before Top 40 was 95% rap and R&B – can you believe it? Instead, we listened to a genre known as “Alternative Rock.” Google it sometime).

Imagine the slow awakening of a long-forgotten memory when I heard Alien Ant Farm’s “Smooth Criminal.” Wait, is this? … This is… What the — ? Is it?… 

Holy crap! It was that song!

“Smooth Criminal” / Alien Ant Farm (2001)

At the time, I (gasp!) liked AAF’s version better. Maybe it was because I had no choice; I heard it no less than 8,938 times a week that summer. But as I listen to each version now, I dig the original much more. I don’t really get anything out of Version 2.0. It’s just like a harder, karaoke version of the song. A post-er (poster?) to the Allmusic site writes “The perverse nature of [Jackson’s] ‘Smooth Criminal’ is no doubt interesting — it’s the musicality that makes it special,” and I agree. I mean – the song is twisted. Why are we listening to a song about a violent home invasion? More importantly, why are we singing along to a song about a violent home invasion? The Original makes me ask these questions. The remake does not.

Nice effort, Ant Farm, but in the grand scheme of things, you’re just kind of phoning it in. MJ is one of the kings of making us feel what he’s singing, even if it’s a little bit disgusted.

The flurry of packing-and-moving-and-packing-and-moving really put a cramp in my daily style, but I think I’ve settled in enough to get back to (hopefully) more regular posting.

If you asked me to make a top-<insert number here> list of my favorite songs, it’ll change. Sure, a handful (think three, perhaps four) always make the rotation, but the rest is usually up for grabs. Does this make me a cheating song whore? Probably, but variety is the spice of life and the bane of free clinics everywhere.

One song to which I remain steadfastly loyal is Curtis Mayfield’s “Move On Up.” I could write at length about it, but I’m not sure y’all are as enamored with it as I; I’ll spare the gushing. Just listen (bad video):

“Move On Up” / Curtis Mayfield (1970)

Suffice to say, when I first heard Kanye’s “Touch The Sky,” my jaw dropped – that hook! Was it? Could it be? What?! Normally I get all red-faced and underbite-d (read: angry face!) when I hear songs I love sampled in other songs (Rihanna, you’re on my list), but this is an exception to the rule. Say what you will about Mr. West, but I dig his stuff, and I particularly like “Touch The Sky.” The horn bit doesn’t hurt things, either (great video):

“Touch the Sky” / Kanye West ft. Lupe Fiasco (2005)

Aaaaanyway, I originally thought I’d try to do a week of songs sampling other songs, but my brain didn’t really want to work that hard. Instead, Imma try to highlight (oops, been listening to too much Kanye) selected songs / remakes of songs and – if I’m feeling really wordy (read: full of myself) – discuss what I like / dislike about them.

Suggestions?

Moving, part 4:

When relocating oneself to a different place of residence, it’s important to take time to anticipate the unanticipated expenses that will be associated with said move. How does one anticipate the unanticipated, you ask? The answer is simple: you do not. You cannot. You will not. You must simply resolve yourself to the fact that, even if one has set aside a “moving budget” of, say $20,000, one will somehow find a way to exceed said budget.

But how does this happen, particularly when one is moving from one fully-furnished and appointed home to another? The answer to this question is a bit trickier, but can be summarized thusly: it is magic.

1. You will lose something while moving and need to replace it. 
The lost item in question can include, but is not limited to: your watch, that extra box of batteries, the remote control to your Blu-Ray player, your shoes, that garbage bag full of winter hats and gloves, a deck of cards, your sofa, your John Travolta movie collection on VHS, DVD and Blu-Ray, the copy of Atlas Shrugged that you’ve been reading since age 18, a pet, a favorite pillow, various canned goods, your keys, or your Spongebob Squarepants alarm clock.

It is gone. Deal with it. Get out the MasterCard now and get thee to a Wal-Mart.

2. Turns out the stuff you thought you could live without is stuff you cannot live without.
Paying rent and utilities is an expensive affair, so you might have convinced yourself that you will “cut back” in other places in order to offset this financial strain. Common spending targets and the associated lies we tell ourselves include, but are not limited to:
“I can live without cable television.”
“I can just go to the public library to use their internet.”
“I have a fan, and do not need to turn my air conditioning below 74 degrees in the summer.”
“I do not need four different types of breakfast cereal from which to choose.”
“I will unplug all electronic devices when I am not using them.”
“I will bring my lunch to work every day, and only go to the super-convenient Subway located fourteen feet from my place of work once a month.”

Lies, gentle reader, all of them. Though you may have never watched cable television in your entire life, you will soon be overwhelmed with a burning desire to watch TBS all damn day and nothing – nothing! – can fill the void in your soul where reruns of “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” could be. You will take a brisk walk to the local library, only to discover that you are sharing computers with a collection of local vagrants and perverts, and that the mouse you are using is uncomfortably greasy and well-worn. You will come home after a long, hot day at work to discover that the paint is melting off of your walls and that your fan has packed its things and left you a downright hurtful goodbye letter. In the morning, you will grow weary of Hunny-Nut Toastee-Ohs and long for Bran Flakes With Raisinz.* After one day of moving furniture just to get at the outlets, you will pull muscles in your back that did not previously exist. And, wincing in pain and suffering from the early symptoms of heat stroke, you will forget to pack your lunch.

It will happen.

3. Everything will need to be reorganized.
A new place brings the promise of a fresh start. For many folks, that means becoming more organized. And if the Rubbermaid Corporation has taught us anything, it’s that to be truly organized, you must run to Target and get yourself a shit-ton of Plastic Organizational Devices For Every Goddamn Room Of Your Home (PODFEGROY for the uninitiated).  Though your system of index cards in a binder clip worked perfectly fine before, you will now need a recipe box. A milk crate on the floor of the closet will no longer do as a place to store shoes. And heaven help you if you just put your shampoo and bath soap on the edge of the tub – you’d be depriving a metal-bath-shelf-maker his meager living!

4. Falling victim to Wal-Mart
This particular chain claims to have low, low prices; this is true – to a point. These “rollbacks” are a bit misleading when one finds oneself trying to push-pull two loaded carts out of the store and to their waiting Ford Pinto. The pillows might only be $0.50, yes, but do you need seven of them? Those lamps do match the curtains, which matches the duvet, which matches the chair pad, which matches the placemats, which matches the soap dish, but HOLD UP. You’re officially caught in the Wal-Mart Cycle, and it’s best to just leave your cart where it is and flee the store. When you return, bring a CLEARLY WRITTEN LIST OF THINGS YOU NEED and a friend (preferably a “I don’t need material possessions to keep me happy and I wear hemp skirts” kind of friend) to keep you in check and remind you that starving children in Cambodia made that lovely set of linen napkins.

…But they match the shower curtain rings!

*For the record, if you do not buy off-brand cereal, you must be crapping money into the toilet each morning.

A little bit softer, now (crappy vid*):

“I’m Not In Love” / 10cc (1966)

Also please read the story behind the band’s name. Lovely.

*One might also argue this is a crappy song, of course.

Moving, part 3:

A short observation today:
When I initially moved in, my mom was ecstatic about the amount of kitchen cabinets I have. I was too, sort of. “You have more than I do!” she exclaimed over and over again (turns out, this is actually true! It took four rolls of shelf liner to cover them all – and you bet your bottom 2.99 that I made sure all drawers and shelves were lined. See previous post to reference my irrational fear of shelf- and drawer-germs).

Last night I set to work unpacking my kitchen. Right now, almost every dish, cup, box of Ziploc baggies and towel I own is sitting on the counter. Makes preparing my lunchtime PB&J a bit of an obstacle, so I figured putting all this stuff away would, you know, be good.

But where to begin? I literally stood in my teeny, galley-style kitchen for five or so minutes, opening and closing cabinets and drawers, evaluating all the possible permutations. The end result: complete and total paralysis of decision-making. Seriously.

If I put my real dishes here, I can put my cups here, but this shelf isn’t tall enough to put a box of cereal so I’ll have to put the mugs over there and if I put all my baking stuff here it’ll be close to the oven but I can’t reach the top shelf so maybe I’ll put that step thing* here so I can reach the shelf above the microwave but seriously, what would I put there? Oh, crap I forgot about these cabinets, what if I put the trash bags here and then I can…. 

*poof!* (head explosion)

*A step-thing that was purchased for the purpose of exercising along with a DVD that proved to be too complicated for my low levels of coordination.

Another “randomly got in my head today” song. No, I don’t know where these come from, either.

“Kiss Me Thru the Phone” / Soulja Boy Tell’em ft. Sammie (2008)