how to be.

For almost as long as I can remember, my mom has joked that I do everything “the Julie way.” What she means is that I somehow find the most difficult, roundabout, bass-ackwards way of doing just about anything. But I get it done, damn it. And in the end, isn’t that what matters? Oh, sure, it would have been easier to not have put that bookshelf together upside down the first time, but I eventually got it right. And I appreciate that fucking bookshelf all the more, because it took me twice as long to build it.

Sometimes I let the following thought slide across my brain: What are you doing with your life? Is this it? Is this really the place you figured you’d end up? And I worry, and sometimes hang my head, because it’s so easy to think that I failed myself. But that’s also bullshit. I just took the long way ’round. Never in a million years did I think I’d be here – physically, emotionally, whateverally. And yet: here I fucking am.

I like it here.

I’d like to stay for awhile.

 

 

 

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: