So here’s an extremely-hypothetical situation for you, about which I personally
am would be extremely-hypothetically excited beyond extremely-hypothetical belief:
Say there is a laptop. It was an old Dell laptop, bought in the fall of 2004. Back in those days, some nefarious individuals would partake in a highly illegal practice of downloading music from a magical place called The Internet and – get this! – they would not pay for it.
“But that’s stealing!” you say, to which I heartily agree. But some people – some poor, despicable souls – simply have no conscience. They treat the rules as their personal playthings, bending and breaking them at will. These souls, dear Reader(s), are the ones who’ve punched a one-way ticket to Hell.
Napster, Limewire, Ruckus – I do not know what these things are but I know they were the Devil’s Tools, taunting cheap young people to help themselves to their tantalizing bounty of music and media. Criminals would spend obscene amounts of time just taking this music that wasn’t theirs – even going so far as to download stuff just because it was there to download. Imagine!
Now also imagine that, for reasons long-ago forgotten, the majority of this highly-illegally procured music just didn’t make the transfer from this old laptop to a new one purchased years later. And this old laptop sat collecting dust in a corner until a few days ago, when its owner very suddenly remembered the treasure trove awaiting her (or him – it could be a him, of course) on its dust-covered hard drive.
So the old laptop is fired up, and – well, it would probably go something like this:
*gasps* NO WAY!
Oh my God!
Where did this come from?
NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY!
I don’t even know who this is…
WHY DIDN’T I DO THIS SOONER?!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!