Today I came across this ad for an “admissions representative” for a local branch of one of those online 2-year schools. Don’t worry about clicking it. I’ll summarize it for you:
Responsibilities include recruiting students (duh), guiding them through the enrollment process (double duh), helping them with forms (triple duh), et cetera et cetera et cetera.
Okay, I’m thinking. I can handle that.
So I read further, to the “qualifications” section:
“Effective time management skills”
Check. Or at least I can fake it for the sake of a paycheck.
“Ability to perform without extensive direct supervision”
Check. Actually, “extensive direct supervision” drives me crazy.
“Willingness to work some nights and weekends”
Check. I’ve never had a job that didn’t require that. Good so far.
“Experience in admissions, weight loss services or dating services a plus”
Che– wait…
what the fuck?
the sloppy copy 
aww. I bet your days as a phone sex operator won’t count. Their loss.